Of Ghouls and Highlanders
by Last Question
Summary: Jason is acting strange. So Nightwing knocks him out. Rated M for language, violence, and mature content.


Random word generator will generate six random words, (rocket science am I right?) and I'll incorporate those words into a short story. *click*

Erotica Surgeon Ghoul Plaid Hearing Dirty

Sounds good!

Disclaimer: I do not own Batman, the characters, or the universe it's set in. That right is reserved for its creators and DC comics.

Rated M for language, violence, and mature content

Of Ghouls and Highlanders

"Holy inferior imperial to metric system Batman!"

"What?"

"Nothing. What did you find on your end?" Nightwing ignored the sigh he heard at the end of his com-link; lifting a glass panel and dropping into an abandoned warehouse. Switching on night-vision he silently surveyed the area. Places like this were never abandoned for long.

"Another dead end. I'm heading back to the Cave to re-evaluate the evidence. Report to me when you're done."

"I know how this works. Nightwing out."

"Bigbird is more sassy than usual."

Nighwing spun around, both Escrimas in hand.

"Little Wing?"

"You seriously need to stop calling me that." Red Hood walked to a breaker box, switching on the overhead lights of the warehouse. Luckily Nightwing turned off his night-vision before the light had a chance to burn his retinas.

"What are you doing here?" Holstering his weapons, Nightwing relaxed his stance.

"I could ask you the same thing." Red Hood smirked at the look his "brother" gave him and briskly made his way to a dusty old office in the back of the warehouse. Nightwing slowly following. Neither could stand the silence for long as they both searched through old documents.

"So I hear you and Bat Daddy are still doing the dirty."

Red Hood froze; the papers in his hands fluttering to the filthy ground, hoping to every deity out there that he did _not_ just say that out loud. Turing to look at Nightwing; the slack-jaw expression on his face, telling him that yes he did just say that out loud. Though he couldn't even remember thinking it. He had to fix this and fast.

"I bet you and Bats are into kinky shit too, like spanking and bondage." Oh my fucking god!

"What the hell is wrong with you?" Nightwing demanded, taking a step forward.

"Just saying that if you want to get your rocks off you should look elsewhere instead of big, dark, and brooding."

Before Red Hood had a chance to process what the hell just happened, he was flat on his back with a pissed off Nightwing staring down at him.

"That's enough Jay. I don't know what kind of psychotic break you're going through now, but that crossed the line."

"Hey, I'm not the one who dreams of being the Bat's bitch!" Shutupshutupshutupshutup.

"Damn it Jay! What has gotten into you?"

"Certainly not Bat dic-"

Nightwing slammed Red Hood's head against the ground, knocking him unconscious.

Meanwhile in the Bat Cave!

Batman was going through the computer, looking for any matching MOs to their Erotica Killer. From the Twin Cities to Hub City there was not one match. So he re-entered the data and searched again, completely unconcerned with the ruckus behind him.

"Damian give it back!"

"What's wrong Drake? Too slow to get back your precious phone?" Damian cackled as he back flipped through the Bat Cave.

"Not slow at all Damian," Tim smirked "just too busy pouring artificial sweetener in your chamomile tea."

"You better not!" Damian stopped in his tracks, a bitter scowl on his face.

"I can and I will if you don't give me back my phone." Tim outstretched his hand waiting patiently, whilst the other was holding a package of splenda precariously over Damian's tea.

Damian slowly made his way over; both steady and untrusting of the other, the exchange was quick as the phone and sugar switched hands.

Damian threw the sugar away with a glare as he poured his all natural agave nectar into his tea. Only the best for one such as him.

"If you boys are finished, we have some work to do." Batman said, removing himself from the computer.

"Still no leads?"

"If father says "there's more work to do" then it's safe to presume there's more work to do." Damian smirked at Tim's answering glare; sipping his tea. Any further conflict abruptly ended with the arrival of Nightwing and what appeared to be a bound and unconscious anti-hero slung over the back of his motorcycle.

"What happened to him?" Tim asked as Red Hood's body was dropped on a metal table none too gently.

"I knocked him out."

"Why did you knock him out?"

"Because bringing him here would be a lot harder if he was awake." Dick didn't want to repeat the whole incident, just thinking about it gave him chills. What gave Jason the idea to use sexual advances; towards their mutual adoptive father, as a witty retort? He heaved a sigh as he made his way to a scowling Batman. Batman never did like not knowing what was going on. He had to make this conversation go as smoothly as possible. Try to figure out all the facts. Don't jump to conclusions. There is sure to be a reasonable explanation to Jason's behavior.

"Jason is a pervert." Smooth, real smooth Grayson.

"Damian. What are you doing?"

"Securing the patient, Mr. Drake." Damian smiled wickedly, strapping down Jason's body on the metal table.

Tim shook his head as he removed Jason's helmet. 'Really Dick?' He questioned the necessity of gagging their unconscious brother. Carefully, he removed the duck tape from Jason's face.

"Timmy wait!"

Tim reared back as Jason jerked awake.

"What the fuc-!" Nightwing slammed his hand over Jason's mouth, muffling the angry obscenities pouring from the wayward bird. He gave a sheepish smile as everyone looked at him like he was crazy.

An embarrassing and unnecessarily long explanation later...

Tim took the whole situation skeptically; not making up his mind on anything just yet, he still needed more information.

Damian took the news as expected, with fierce distaste and out for blood. Namely, Jason's blood.

As usual, Batman didn't say a word. Back at the computer, he was madly typing away. Jason was unpredictable, brash and combative. But something like this was uncharacteristic, and Jason's expressed mortification only furthered his innocents.

As for Nightwing? He felt bad. Maybe he jumped the gun. Maybe he made a mountain out of a molehill. And when he looked at the immobile and helpless Jason; the sly smirk that clearly shown through the duck tape, he knew without a doubt that this was perfectly reasonable and Jason was a bastard.

Alfred was seemingly unconcerned with the situation. He operated as if nothing had changed. He made his way to Jason's prone form, carrying rubbing alcohol and cotton swabs. And with the precision of a skilled surgeon, easily removed the spirit gum holding Jason's domino mask in place. But this? Well, this was unexpected to be sure. From his pocket he produced a penlight; frowning after his quick examination he steadily made his way to Master Bruce.

"Excuse me Sir."

"What is it Alfred?" Batman growled under his breath, nothing was making sense. He had thought maybe Jason was drugged or exposed to a variation of fear gas that had caused his unusual behavior. But his blood work and neuro scans came up negative. What was the cause? Why wasn't Nightwing affected? Was this at all in correlation with their Erotica Killer? What was Alfred saying?

"I'm sorry, what did you say Alfred?"

"Not much Sir. I was just concerned that my memory is not as sharp as it used to be. For all my years in your service there's not a detail I could easily forget, especially concerning when you and the boys were children."

"Please get to the point, Alfred."

"It was just a surprise Sir. For I explicitly remember master Jason's eye color to be a pale blue. Not an acid green"

A shrill sound filled the bat cave, the computers glaring 'ALERT' in bold red script, and the bats awoke to get away from the sound. "PERIMETER BREACH!"

"Nightwing!"

"On it!"

Nightwing ran to the computer, bringing up the surveillance feed. A dark blur ran passed camera H-75. Jumping to H-88, he was only able to catch another glimpse of the intruder.

"Intruder is making his way through the main northwest tunnel and he's coming in fast!" Nightwing set the cave to lock down and watched as the deployed bat-droids gave chase. This guy was going right through them!

"Batman, he's still coming."

Nightwing turned to see why Batman wasn't at the computer himself. Only now did he hear the muffled screaming. Jason was struggling in his bonds; face red and covered with sweat, he was having a seizure.

"Set lock down to level 3." Batman grunted, trying to re-secure one of Jason's hands.

"Too late." Damian called, standing at the ready next to Red Robin.

"He's already here."

Batman was momentarily stunned that someone easily made it passed his security system, giving Jason enough time to pull his arm free and rip the tape off his mouth.

"You fucking piece of shit! I won't let you take me!"

The intruder roared and dived at Jason. Disappearing inside the snarling boy. Jason gasped, his body going still, eyes unblinking.

The intruder wandered the darkness. Seeing shadows and echoes of a time before The Great Change. A time when continuity wasn't a huge issue and things fell more or less into place. Besides reality destroying punches but that was neither here nor there. Seriously, Oracle can walk now. That shit is crazy. I mean, good for her and all... but really? The intruder coughed in his fist, shaking away the forth-wall breaking thoughts. Moving deeper into the darkness he was suddenly blinded by a terrible fire. A beautiful woman stood before him. The consciousness of the boy they were in was bound and gagged at her feet. A skillful and complicated construct of leather, lace, and fluffy pink handcuffs. She was as good as he remembered. "What are you doing here you piece of human excrement?" He shivered at her vulgarity; she hadn't changed at all.

"You need to stop this Sarah."

"Deprivia."

"Okay, Deprivia. You have to stop. Look at the boy, you're terrifying him." Jason stared at the two crazily dressed people. Wondering what the fuck was going on.

"His body is perfect."

"What do you mean?"

She stretched and hummed, the fire eating more of the surrounding darkness. "He was dead once. His body and soul in two worlds. Living and dead. He's in and between, this and the next. He is perfect."

"I don't understand."

"I plan to take this body. I didn't want to die then and I don't want to now. I want to live again."

"And the others? Why did you leave them like that? Why did you do it?"

"They only lasted so long. It made me angry. And you know better than to make me angry, don't you Peter?"

"It's not like before, Deprivia! You can't keep doing this and I can't keep following you. You have to stop."

"Teg eht lleh tuo fo sih ydob uoy tirips skaerf!"

Jason awoke to the two strange entities kneeling and gasping before him. He tried to get up but found his arms and legs strapped to the table. He was getting really tired of being tied up.

"You okay little wing?" A concerned Nightwing asked.

"Yeah, this happens often."

"Really?"

"No dumbass, now let me up."

Nightwing smiled as he removed the restraints.

"Who are you?" Batman growled at the two intruders. They both stayed silent, regaining their strength from the sudden 'exorcism' .

" Rewsna mih." Commanded Zatanna.

"My name is Peter," said the strangely dressed male, "and this is Sarah."

"Deprivia!" She corrected.

"So, what are they?" Jason asked his brothers, putting on his hood sans domino mask.

"Zatanna said they're Ghouls. Or something like it." Tim answered from the computer, searching what he could find on their "guests".

"After the guy in the plaid skirt jumped into you, we called Zatanna. She said if we hadn't acted so quickly, that crazy woman would have taken over your body." Nightwing scratched the back of his neck. "About earlier-"

"That wasn't me."

"I know."

". . .Sorry."

"Me too."

"If the both of you are quite finished, we have an interrogation to commence and though I loath to say it, father needs your assistance."

"Whatever you say, brat." Red Hood ruffled Robin's hair. Robin in turn called him a mongrel and glared at a smiling Dick.

Red Hood stood behind the intruders.

"So stop me if you heard this before. A highlander and a dominatrix jump into a body."

"I tried to stop her!" Defended Peter.

"By joining in?"

"No!"

"Why are you dressed like that?" Asked Damian.

"Adult stuff!"

"Disgusting!"

"It's not disgusting! It's beautiful and powerful!" Deprivia piped in.

"Peter Razinsky and Sarah Sullivan." Red Robin stepped in.

"Peter's great grandfather immigrated from Russia in the 60's and Sarah is a native to Gotham. Both led modest lifestyles, average income, single, no kids. Their recreation habits were, uhh... very adult."

"Just say it!" Deprivia snapped.

"BDSM." Red Robin tried to hide his blush. His brothers snickering not helping.

"Continue." Batman glared.

"Both were victims of a block fire caused by a 7.6 earthquake. The one that almost destroyed Gotham."

Batman gritted his teeth after hearing the last part. These people; these victims, were his responsibility.

"What happened?" Zatanna turned to Sarah, hearing about her own death seemed to subdue her.

"It was different. Doing this; no matter how strange, made me feel powerful and beautiful. I brought out the strangeness in myself and in others. We broke free from everything else. It was wonderful. I was with Peter when the fire broke out." Sarah seemed mortified by her own admission.

"It's not like I did this with anyone! And after I met Peter, after the first time we bonded."

"I wanted to marry you." Peter looked at Sarah with the grief of a man whose seen too much. After all these years it finally made sense to her, why he chased her this whole time. Even after death.

"No evom." Zatanna said quietly.

Peter and Sarah began to fade. Peter hoped to every power in the universe that he would be allowed to follow Sarah. No matter where she went. Sarah held Peter's hand, whispering something in the air only Zatanna could hear. Then, they were gone.

"So it was Sarah who was The Erotica killer. She just wanted to live again." Said Nightwing solemnly.

Zatanna coughed loudly to get their attention. "Yeah, you would think that, but. . ."

"What?"

"Sarah said it wasn't her."

"Then who was it?" Questioned Batman.

"In an amazing string of coincidences, she just happened to possess the bodies of people who were targeted to be murdered."

"But the way they died, as if they were taking part in erotic play, hence Erotica Killer."

"Oh, that was her, but she just left them like that."

Red Robin didn't like the odds of what Zatanna was telling him. And if it was true, the MO has changed. The killer is still out there.

Meanwhile . . .In the back of some ... shady place. . .

"How's it goin' kid?"

"Man, I can't do this no more."

"Be an assassin?"

"No. Taking jobs in Gotham."

"I know what you mean, the Bat can be a real hardass."

"I didn't even run into the Batman or anyone. It was real easy, in and out and the murders looked like accidents."

"Then? What's the problem?"

"Is everyone in Gotham into BDSM?"

"What?"

"Nothing, I'm gonna get going. See'ya Deadshot."

"Later kid."

Deadshot watched the kid trudge away. BDSM? It's been awhile since he's been in Gotham. Maybe he should pay a visit.

(A/N Done!... wtf was I thinking?)


End file.
